This week, the bell curve decides who ‘exceeds expectations’ and who just needs more cowbell.

To each their own, a lighthearted nod to quirky obsessions.

This week, our cube‑cows are freaking out about AGI, while the only one actually up for any work is still the rubber duck.

Like a mouse to cheese: people who circle the offer, angle for favors, and rarely refill the favor bank. Mind what you hand out.

This week, our cube-cows are all in on SMART culture: your passion is ours now; Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Time-bound.

God makes them, then they find each other: street shorthand for birds of a feather, often with a skeptical wink.

You cannot fear what you are prepared for; under denial, fear climbs and panic() instead of plans. advance() is for after you drop the dodge: face the trend, prepare, act.

This week, our free-range knowledge cows get open pens, bottomless coffee, and just enough fence to keep the ideas from wandering off.

Packed tighter than sardines in a tin: Venezuelan shorthand for no room left to move.

Building a narrative is cheaper than debunking it; repetition and “many sources” are easy to manufacture, and a “source” can look the same from the outside. How many of your thoughts are yours?